Writing My Life

Now and Then


1 Comment

Day 18 ~ Thankful That I’m NOT Bitten by TWILIGHTmANIA

Okay, maybe I’m a little jealous that my sister is going to see the New Moon premiere with her daughters at a theatre bought out by a friend of my niece’s, and they’re going to get Twilight gift bags and everything. But on the other hand, I’m NOT 15 anymore even though READING Twilight made me feel that way all over again – which was kinda fun!

What I’m REALLY covetous of is Stephanie Meyer’s drive to write a book based on a dream because she didn’t want the story to end upon awakening. So she put pen to paper or fingers to keys and worked through the Edward and Bella relationship. And then, she gathered up enough gumption to get the thing published, and the rest is history.

I would only assume that aspiring writers naturally turn green at the very mention of the famous author’s name, but I’ve found that successful authors are disgusted with her celebrity as well. When I say disgusted, I mean disgusted that they didn’t throw a sexy teen vampire into one of their plots. Young Adult writer, Gary Soto, didn’t mince any words about wishing he had thought of that. Of course, his vampire character would have been a Latin hunk.

(I need to find out what Anne Rice thinks of this latest outbreak of vampire mania and the author who re-ignited it. I wonder if Twilight readers have turned into Vampire Chronicle readers because they are thirsting  looking for more. – Sorry I couldn’t resist the pathetic pun; probably should have inserted a “pun alert.”)

The interesting phenomenon about phenomenons is that a writer like J.K. Rowling or Stephanie Meyer didn’t wake up one day and declare, “Today I’m going to write an international best-selling series that will knock the socks off readers both young and old. And the books will be so wildly popular that production studios will beat down my door, begging to adapt the books into movies. Finally, marketing crazies will mass produce everything from action figures to blood-based cosmetic lines that will not only make the fans happy, they will make me a multi-millionaire/billionaire.”

No, these women tapped into their imaginations and then ran with the results because they liked their stories and wanted to see their characters come to life for themselves and for whatever readers might find these people on paper interesting. (Whew! That’s a long sentence!)

Two of my four sons have similar desires, but in the movie world. My oldest, Chris, has written at least 7 screen plays and has yet to see one make it to a screen – big or little. But he doesn’t quit writing AND marketing to investors. (See Bullpen Studios! Very cool!)

His youngest brother Tim shares his dreams and his talents with his big brother. Two of Chris’ screen-writes are Tim’s creation. Plus Little Brother has acted in some indies, performed on stage, photographs the world, digitally draws like a professional! Of course, he does all this WITHOUT pay! He’d be a starving student if he didn’t live in our basement while chasing his dream. We just hope he catches it before turning 30! And so does he!!

As for me, blogging is the closest I’ve come to “publishing” on a continuous basis. And I like to think I bring a little laughter into the lives of the 5 or 10 readers who drop by on occasion. That doesn’t mean, I don’t have dreams of something bigger. I suppose I better get on with the pursuit. At age 61, I don’t have all the time in the world. But who does?

HERE’S TO DREAMS!


1 Comment

Day 17 ~ From Dark ‘n Dank to My Favorite Hide-Away

Sometimes I wonder what pushes me to keep doing this – posting every day for 30 days. Is it because I want to celebrate Thanksgiving in writing? Is it because I want to see if I can really complete the challenge? Perhaps it’s because I want to develop a habit of journaling everyday.  And, according to some obscure self-help book,  if you want to form a habit, do that thing for 30 days.  We’ll see. Maybe I want to examine my life, for Socrates advised that “a life unexamined is not worth living.”

Whatever the reason, I feel like this has been a good experience. Throughout the day, I often contemplate what I am grateful for and then try to decide which of those I want to blog about. I mentioned more than once that I’m well aware of many significant blessings in my life; nevertheless, I write about pretty simple, even silly things. Why? Because I don’t have to think so deeply about such incidentals. I can write at a “surface level” which doesn’t take nearly as long as laboring over thoughtful pieces.

So, what minor necessity/luxury do I appreciate on the 17th day of blogging? My hide-away/ my refuge/my BASEMENT!

Until we moved here to the little-house -on-the-golf-course, we had not enjoyed a finished basement. But I wasn’t too sad about that because I’ve never really been a big fan of basements. Let’s face it, for  long time, these subterranean rooms were cReEPy!

Gramma H’s was the scariest because it was more of a cellar, while Gramma B’s basement included a finished bedroom of sorts where my sister and I slept when staying the night. Both of my grandparents’ basements, however,  housed monstrous coal furnaces – the kind that inspires NiGhTMaReS! There were also fruit rooms in these cellars, but in addition to canned peaches, tomatoes, and pears, we could also find bottled spiders and preserved earwigs amongst the dust and cobwebs. Sometimes I hated retrieving harvest bounties from such sinister confines, but upon other occasions, I enjoyed pretending I was an orphaned child left to my own devices in the dungeon of an abandoned mansion. Imagination nearly always fortified the courage needed to wander down creaking stairs and meander through narrow and dank passages to my destination. More than once, however, a sudden clang or mysterious groan from the furnace room sent me scuttling back up the stairs to the warmth of Gramma’s kitchen.

The basement in my childhood home was modern in comparison. Mom and Dad refinished it to include a “rumpus room” or “TV room” – precursor to the  “family room” of the 70s and 80s and the “great room” of today. Our rumpus room ran nearly the entire length and width of the front of the house, thus allowing for a cozy TV-watching nook and a hobby area where Mom often sewed and worked on other projects. I can still see the yards of Kelly-green and gray linoleum flooring and remember the “dutch-door” that opened into the room by halves. I’m not sure why my folks installed such a door, but it was a built-in play thing for Connie and me. We loved to open the top half and pretend to take orders for hamburgers like waitresses did at walk-up diners. Other times, we’d close the top half of the door, open the bottom and just duck and run in and out, in and out, in and out. I don’t know why we thought that was so fun, but we did.

A semi-finished play room and an unfinished wash room and furnace room each held its own memories of mischief and mayhem. Once I played with candles in the playroom, and when Mom called me upstairs, I hurried and blew out the flame – or so I thought. Because the candle was stuck in the center of a stack of black plastic coasters, the burning wick melted both wax AND plastic, creating caustic, black, billowing smoke. The smoldering coasters slowly burned the top of our little wooden kitchen table until the acrid odor wafted upstairs and alerted Mom and Dad. The young pyromaniac was justly punished!

The washroom served as the scene of a birthday mystery. While patiently playing at the neighbor’s, waiting  for my party to start , I decided to return and search for Mom because I worried that my cake remained UNfrosted.  I could not find her anywhere in the kitchen or bedrooms, so I turned my investigation to the basement. As I clip-clopped down the stairs, I noticed drops of blood splattered on nearly every step! I followed the trail to find a small pool of the red stuff in the wash room. Screaming her name, I ran outside, sure that some basement boogie-man had first maimed and then kidnapped my mother ON MY BIRTHDAY! I don’t remember how long I wandered from door to door looking for her, but I finally learned that a friend rushed Mom to the hospital to stitch up the finger she nearly sliced off with a wire cutter! In spite of her injury, my cake was frosted and my party at Ross Park proceeded as scheduled. WHAT A MOM!

I hid the evidence of my sugar habit in the crevices and crannies of the unfriendly furnace room. I think my addiction to straight-from-the-package-Jello started when the neighborhood Jello junkie gathered us urchins to the field at the entrance of our street. The tall weeds hid our clandestine activities from the grown-ups. Better than PixiStix, the powdery substance was divided among a half-dozen dirty cupped hands. We savored every lick, but the paltry portion didn’t satisfy my lust for sugar. For weeks after, I robbed our kitchen cupboards of J-E-L-L-O! I’d head for the furnace room and lick the sticky stuff until both my palms and tongue turned bright red, orange, or green – depending upon the available flavor! Not wanting to risk Mom finding the boxes and wax-paper pouches in the trash, I stuffed the evidence behind stacks of  boxes and barrels that shared space with the furnace. (I guess I thought Mom and Dad wouldn’t notice my colorful hands or tongue.) Of course, she always stumbled upon the proof of my thievery and consumptive habit, and it drove her cRaZy! She didn’t think I’d ever wean myself from the sugary goodness! (In years since I’ve tried another lick or 2, but somehow it just doesn’t have the same appeal as it did when I fed my habit in hiding!)

As I finally finish this lengthy rambling, I’m sitting in my cozy hide-away. The overstuffed sectional circles around the big screen TV, which is playing Sinatra/American Standards over a SIRIUS music station. My feet are propped up on the HUGE ottoman; bookshelves line the walls; and the lights are low. I can feel the stress of the day drain away as I relax here in the BASEMENT. Ahhhhhh!

Good night.


Leave a comment

Day 16 ~ Thankful that ALL Ended WELL!

Day 16 NaWriMoPo November challenge: Starting the downward slope!

For awhile there, I thought I’d be checking myself into the nearest asylum, but not only did I survive, relationships thrived! I just finished a stint caring for my oldest son’s 4 children while Mom and Dad cruised the Caribbean. I share the responsibilities with the “other” grandma, taking shifts 1 and 3: the bookend weekends. This equaled 6+ days of the 10.

During my first shift, oldest sister asked if she could rollerblade with her friend for a FEW minutes, and she even volunteered to take along her littlest brothers(ages 3 and 18 months) and push them in their double stroller. This enabled me to clean up uninterrupted, a luxuary for moms and babysitters!

About 30 LONG minutes later, as I was ready to head out in search of Sis, the phone rang.

Hi! (panic in voice of young stranger.) This is M., T.’s friend. (Voice pitch rising with every word) Well, T. fell on top of C. (18-month-old) while she was trying to help C.J. (3-year-od). And, well, she thinks her arm is broken.

Me: WHERE ARE YOU? (Voice pitch can’t rise any higher or grow any louder)

M.: Uh, we’re at the big church (1/2 mile away and on a busy street), and we’re walking home.

Me: STAY PUT; I’LL BE RIGHT THERE! (Oh, great! Can’t wait to call the parents and tell them that before they even left the harbor, their daughter might be docking at the emergency room!)

Upon my arrival at the accident scene, the uninjured friend was pushing the injured 10-year-old and BOTH toddlers in the stroller! (If I hadn’t been in stress mode, I would have snapped a picture with my camera!)

Grampa arrived at home about the same time I safely delivered the sobbing victim, and he proceeded to boost her spirts: “Come on now, little camper! Don’t you know you have pioneer blood in your veins? Why your ancestors crossed the plains without a whimper or a whine! Now dry up those tears so I can get you to the doctor. I can’t take you to the clinic if you’re crying.”

The tender attention perked her right up. Three hours later, Grampa returned with the laughing T. and her giggling friend. No broken arm, but ace bandages held the form-fitting splint in place. Once the X-rays were analyzed, the doctor assured her that she could take off the splint, but NO! Miss T. had to come back with some indicator that she had been injured. She wore the splint for 2 and a half hours.

This is NOT the only adventure of the 6 days in November, but it’s all I can record right now! Just think, I didn’t miss a posting an entry on my blog during the entire fiasco!!!


Leave a comment

Day 15 ~ To “See” or Not to “See” ….

I’ve decided not to start with a title because the last few entries strayed so far from my original idea that I was forced to manipulate the title to bring it a little closer to the point but still not drastically removed from the original. The reason I feel compelled to keep a semblance of my first title is because it remains forever embedded in the web-address. I don’t know why I feel I must explain this, but I do.

Today, I am thankful for options to delete OR to change the visibility of entries. You see, last night I decided to write about the wonders of rocking a child, especially your own or a grandchild. Instead I launched into a description of my insane week.

The words just flew from brain to fingers to screen! I was in the zone; I was experiencing flow; and IT FELT GOOD. All the frustrations, indignities, and craziness of the past days melted away – I felt like I was in a Calgon bath. Ahhhhhhhhh!

And it was a funny piece, too. Sure sarcasm lay at the heart of the humor, but it wasn’t too vicious. Furthermore, my points were pretty well made – at least I thought so, and for awhile I believed some of my very few readers would agree.

Refreshed and revitalized, I clicked the “Publish” button after only two minor revisions (a first, I believe) and readied for bed at 9:22 P.M.  Before 10:00, I snuggled deep into the down comforter, hoping to quickly fall asleep. And then it hit me. My post was an ornery one! Guilt became my bedfellow, and I started reviewing every line and countering every point.

I am FORTUNATE to own the issues I have. What did I really have to complain about? Sure, I may have been right about this or that, but is being right always important? Especially when others’ feelings are involved? And I care very much about these “others.” What if a miracle occurred, and they actually logged on and read my blog – something the NEVER do, but what if this time they did? How would they take it? Would they see the humor in the situation, and maybe even agree with me? Probably NOT.

They would offer counter points, too, that could make sense if I were open minded at all. Oh, and I also brought the circumstances upon myself by agreeing to participate! As always, I have options, and I chose the first one, so why complain – right?

Darn, before 15 minutes passed, I decided to delete the entry, but I’m trying to post 30 times in 30 days! (CURSE YOU, NaBloPoMo.) I really didn’t have the time to delete this posting and create another. And I then I remembered the visibility option – the Holy Grail of blogging repentance. Hoo ray! I could make these grumpy thoughts PRIVATE ones! For MY eyes only! Whew!

Besides, it was a pretty good entry. I made some decent arguments. And it was kind of funny.


Leave a comment

Day 11 ~ Thankful for “Small World” Surprises

Within this big world of ours exists dozens of small worlds – well, dozens for a person like me, but maybe 100s for others. The number of circles one travels in usually determines the number of small worlds contained within the whole.

If you’re wondering if the late hour has affected my capacity for rational thought, I will explain … but not right now. Because you are right! It is late, and I am tired, but I want to keep my commitment to post everyday for 30 days – even if this entry is just a teaser. Stay tuned to learn more about why I LOVE my small world surprises!

sMaLL wOrLd

For now, I’m heading for bed to dream about what I’m going to write – TOMORROW! Well, tomorrow came and went, but craziness ensued thus keeping me from completing my thoughts about how small our world really is.

I figure people travel in many small worlds – family words, neighborhood worlds, work and church worlds, hobby and club worlds, etc. Depending upon what we do with our time, talents, and energies, we may travel in few or many worlds. But all that doesn’t matter. One of the fun parts of traveling worlds is stumbling upon connections from our other worlds.

For example, the other day my colleague and I were meeting with teachers at on of our district’s middle schools. Carolyn conducted the first part of the meeting and asked that each participant share her name, teaching position, years in education, and where she’d like to spend a vacation. (One lone male attended this meeting, and so the pronoun references are all feminine. Sorry if any male readers are offended.)

The introductions worked down the table until a teacher I did not know shared her information. The last part of her intro went something like this:

TD: I’d like to go to Germany because I spent part of my childhood in Frankfurt.

Me (to myself): Frankfurt? I wonder if she lived there when I was there. Hmmm. She’s younger than me so it’s unlikely. I wonder if I knew her parents. Could I be THAT old? (interrupting the next teacher) Uh, T. When did you live in Frankfurt?

TD: When I was 6.

Me: What was your maiden name?

TD: A……son. My dad was a psychiatrist serving in the army, and we were there for –

Me (growing in agitation): WHAT was your MOM’S name?

TD: C …, and my Dad is ….. .

Me (squealing!): I KNOW YOUR PARENTS!!! THEY ATTENDED THE SAME CHURCH MY HUSBAND AND I WENT TO. YOU WERE ALL SUCH A BEAUTIFUL FAMILY; ALL BRUNETTES. OMIGOSH! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS. WHAT A SMALL WORLD!!!!

TD: Oh, I can’t wait to tell Mom and Dad. We’ll have to talk!

I just LOVE days like that one! For the next several hours, I took a trip in my head – back to Frankfurt, Germany when I was a young bride and Hubby was a sexy soldier. Back to wonderful friends who filled in for family while we were so far away from our own. Names I thought I’d never forget but hadn’t thought of for years. Experiences that I treasure even though the details hide in corners of my memory.

But connecting one of my worlds to another helped me dust off some of those treasures!! So glad it’s a SMALL WORLD afterall!


4 Comments

Thankful for Daddy, Our WWII Veteran

Memories of Daddy
By Henry and Rebecca’s Daughters

My sister and I shared these thoughts at Daddy’s funeral 2 years ago. I decided to “post” our love with any readers who stop by tomorrow on Veteran’s Day. He bravely served his country and loved the USA deeply. We ARE so proud of him.      

Hank in uniform

Daddy

 

As I sat at Dad’s bedside these last few days, I held his hands in mine. I tried to memorize what they looked like so I wouldn’t forget them. I began to think about all of the things he did with those hands during his life time.    

For those of you who think of my sister as the shy little Connie B., let me tell you that you don’t know Connie, the take-charge nurse! After Daddy’s passing, and we decided we wanted to speak at the funeral, she said she thought of talking about Daddy’s hands. Then she added, “And I thought you could talk about his feet.” No one says no to Nurse Connie; so my talk today is about Daddy’s feet and where they took him throughout his life.    

When Daddy was three-years-old, those little feet powered his stick horse. But one day that little stick horse fell into a canal that ran along Thirteenth Avenue near his home in Pocatello, Idaho. When Dad reached in to grab his toy, he fell in. Luckily, he was with his little buddy Don Robinson who grabbed Dad’s clothes, held on and screamed until his mother came. We’ll be forever grateful to Don for saving Daddy’s life so that we could spend so many years with him.    

While a young boy, he would fold the Pocatello newspaper neatly into a square; the last corner carefully tucked away so when he tossed it onto a porch from his bicycle, it wouldn’t fall apart. H rode all over Pocatello delivering those papers.    

Yes, after so carefully folding all those copies of the Idaho State Journal, Dad’s feet peddled his bicycle up and down the streets in the early morning hours. But on Sunday, those feet walked to and from the Pocatello 2nd ward of the LDS Church where he attended Sunday School and Sacrament meetings. As a young deacon, those feet walked the aisles as he passed the sacrament, but as a teenager, he trudged up and down the bleachers at baseball games, selling popcorn, peanuts and beer to all those rookie league fans. Until one day, the Pocatello East Stake president attended a game and told Dale a priesthood holder should not be selling beer. Dad quit the job soon after    

He used those talented hands to learn to play the trumpet. Along with his brothers and sisters, he played in the Barrett Family Band. They played all over southern Idaho, even on Christmas Night, which didn’t make him too happy. But this did start a life-long love of music.    

His hands struggled to perform algebra and geometry problems – oh, how he hated math! A trait he passed onto his daughters – “Thanks, Dad!”    

Yes, as a member of the Poky High band, Dad’s feet marched in bands at games and in parades. Once part of the “best trumpet trio in Idaho” – as stated by his sister and our Aunt Margaret – he stood in the Mormon Tabernacle to perform as part of that trio. A few years later, his feet tapped out the beat of swing songs and serenades as part of the Gene Burton band – Pocatello’s version of Glenn Miller’s or Tommy Dorsey’s bands. They frequently provided the music for dances at Idaho State University.    

After graduating from Pocatello High School in 1942, his hands signed his enlistment papers in February 1943 when only 18 years old. As a member of the Eighth Air Force 379th Bomb Group, he flew 35 missions aboard a B-17 Flying Fortress. Because he was so tall, he became the top-turret gunner, using his hands to defend the country he loved so much.
At 18, he feared his flat feet might keep him out of serving his country during World War II, also known as WWII – the Big One. Actually, his love of Coca Cola almost prevented him from being inducted. During his physical, the doctors determined he had albumen; so his family doctor ordered him off Coke for a week and that did the trick.    

During the war, Dad proved he had no feet of clay as he quickly moved from one end of that B-17 to the other to keep it in flying order. This was no easy task because often times the bomb bay doors jammed and he had to hand-crank them open with very little between him and the wild blue yonder. Those feet rushed him safely from two crash landings – both occurring during his first two missions. Once I asked him how he dared go up for a third.    

On one occasion, he saved a buddy’s life in a most unusual way. A grandson of this crewmate wrote Dad to thank him for saving his grandfather’s life. It seems this young bombardier failed to dress in his heated underwear prior to one of their flights. It gets very cold in those planes, and after performing their duties, Dad held his friend on his lap, wrapping his arms around him to keep him warm until they returned safely to base.    

(Today we are honored to have one of Daddy’s crew members with us in the congregation. Paul Lineberry served with Dad as a ball-turret gunner on those 35 missions! We greatly appreciate his attendance here today.)    

At the end of the War, he sent home on leave. His sister Margaret wanted to line him up with her good friend from work. Upon picking them up at the shuttle stop, Dad took one look at Rebecca Howe, and it was “love at first sight” for both of them. A few weeks later, he took her hand in his, and placed a gold band upon her finger, and she did the same to him. That gold band remains on his hand to this day, a bit worn but a great symbol of their love for each other.    

On February 5, 1966, he took my mother’s hand in his across our Heavenly Fathers sacred altar in the Idaho Falls Temple, and there they were sealed as eternal companions.    

After completing a successful tour of duty, he returned home to Pocatello on leave. Those feet walked on air when he met that 5’3” brunette, Becky Howe. Not long after meeting her, he knocked her off her feet when he asked, “Where have you been all my life?” From anyone else that may have sounded like a great pick-up line, but from my dad, it was tender and sincere. He fell in love with her the minute he saw her and he never stopped loving her. His last conscious expression was to confirm his love for her and to pucker up for one final kiss.    

After a few years of marriage, Dad became a father. His large hand gently held his tiny daughter Renae. Two years later, on the day before Father’s Day, I was born. Daddy was always so gentle and kind. He loved his girls so much, he could never use his hands to spank us.    

When he would get home from work or a business trip, I would run and jump into his arms. He would pick me up, and I would hug him tight, give him a kiss, and then I would always ask him, “Any gum, Chum?” Sometimes I got it; sometimes I didn’t, but I always got a kiss.    

Through the years, Dad’s feet walked the floors with his baby daughters and wandered around the kitchen as he cooked our daily breakfasts or whipped up a batch of donuts. Yes, donuts. Dad loved to deep fry that yummy snack, and I especially liked the donut holes.    

Dad would hold our hands as we tried ice skating; his hands steadied a wobbly bike so a seven-year-old could learn to ride; and his hands tucked us snuggly into bed at night.    

Dad used his hands to cut up fruit, but being an Idaho boy, he also loved to cut up potatoes and eat them raw. One morning Mom looked over at his bowl of cut up fruit and noticed he had added raw potatoes in with the apples and bananas! Whenever I invited Mom and Dad up for dinner, I made sure I cut some raw potato just for him.    

Daddy loved to put many miles on his feet in community service as he and Mom worked with good friends for good causes as part of the Pocatello Junior Chamber of Commerce. We have one picture of this group raising money for the fight against polio. In later years, he served shut-ins through the “Meals on Wheels” program. His feet also walked the halls of a Banning, CA elementary school to tutor struggling students.    

In fear of making Daddy sound too perfect, I thought it only right to mention Dad also had a lead-foot. We could make the two-hour drive from Pocatello to Twin Falls in an hour and a half, and it only took 15 or 20 minutes to get to Arimo. Those speeding tickets created a slight bone of contention between Mom and him. Dad’s feet were even behind bars once and Mom had to bail him out – not because of unpaid speeding tickets, but because of unpaid parking tickets.    

His hands took great care of every yard he owned; put up an American flag, and covered his heart to honor his country.    

As Connie and I grew up, he stood as a witness at our temple weddings, stood in the blessing circles of babies. With feet planted firmly on the floor as he sat, he held each little one on the length of his long lap.    

During the past decade, Daddy’s feet betrayed him as he suffered from neuropathy. Nevertheless, he never gave up walking – first with a cane and then with a walker. Only the last week of his life did he stop walking.    

It mattered not that his feet failed, he always stood firmly beside Mom and she beside him. She tenderly served his every need as he struggled to fight his infirmities. One of Mom’s final acts of service as he lay dying was to rub his feet and his restless legs. When nothing else soothed them, that did, and she told us how he loved that sweet act of love.    

One of the last things I saw Daddy’s hands do was when I stood at the foot of his bed, he looked at me, pointed his finger right at me. I pointed back and he said the last words I remember him saying: “Connie B.” That little action meant the world it me; it said to me, “I love you Connie B.”    

As Connie and I close, Mom, Connie and I want to thank Heavenly Father for the great blessing of having Daddy in our lives. Henry Dale leaves the greatest legacy of all – a family who loved and adored him.    

We are also thankful for a Savior who, upon his resurrection, said to his disciples, “Why are ye troubled? And why do thoughts arise in your hearts? Behold my hands and my feet, that it is I myself; handle me, and see; for a spirit hath not flesh and bones, as ye see me have. And when he had thus spoken, he shewed them his hands and his feet.”    

I have no doubt that my sweet father is with the Savior this day, and that he is wrapped in the loving arms of his parents, his siblings and members of Mom’s family as well. For they all loved him so much.


1 Comment

Day 9 ~ And the Wall Came Tumbling Down

Today I talked with a colleague about the collapse of the Berlin Wall and the impact it had upon us Baby Boomers. I wasn’t very old before I realized that I lived in a scary era. Now there are those who say, “The 1950s? A scary era? No way! That was the ideal time to grow up. Peace and prosperity permeated the decade. Life was a combination of Father Knows Best and Leave It to Beaver!”

When Billy Joel’s younger fans suggested a similar scenario about Billy’s childhood, he responded by composing \”We Didn\’t Start the Fire!\”  Reading through the lyrics exposes the good, the bad, and the ugly aspects of the 4 decades of the singer/songwriter’s  life from his birth in 1949 to his 40th birthday in 1989.  (By the way, Mr. Joel and I are  almost the same age.)

I won’t argue that growing up in the 50s and 60s was really a terrific time to come of age, but that doesn’t negate the fact that underlying the idyllic setting of a home in the suburbs; a mother, father, two children, and a dog lurked the threat of a nuclear attack by the USA’s arch-nemisis, the United Soviet Socialist Republic (USSR).  

The influence of the  Cold War upon movie plots supplied my most dramatic awareness of this tense situation. I know we practiced “duck and cover” drills at Lewis and Clark Elementary, but I didn’t take that interruption of the school day any more seriously than students

Effects of Nuclear Fallout
The Incredible Shrinking Man, 1957

pay attention to earthquake drills today. What really scared me witless was the cinematic story of a man caught in the fallout of an atomic or nuclear explosion. Watching “the incredible shrinking man” diminish in size until an arachnid hunted him down triggered months of nightmares.

When I wasn’t dreaming of bomb blasts, I was worrying about them especially after watching the leader of the USSR, Nikita Khruchev, pound his shoe upon the United Nations’ podium while yelling, “WE WILL BURY YOU!” I even imagined a scene where I learned World War III was to start at any time. Somehow, I saw myself working my way to Moscow and receiving an audience with the Premier. Frightened as I was, I tried to reason with the pudgy bald man who looked more like Elmer Fudd than a Communist leader. In my young mind, I could not imagine anyone turning away the argument for peace when presented by an 9-year-old girl.

I learned years later that Mom and Dad had attended a  meeting about building a bombshelter and had seriously considered investing in one. Like the majority of Americans, they decided against it for reasons of unaffordable expense and lack of practicality.  (Perhaps they pictured 20 years cooped up in the claustrophobic cement cottage, emerging with 2 mal-adjusted daughters to a world of burnt metal and skeletal remains. Or even worse, they missed hearing, “This is only a test,” and stepped out into a world where the Soviet Union was on the verge of collapse – not because OUR missiles were bigger than THEIR missiles but because Communism had run its course.

So, today as I contemplated November 9, 1989 and watched again the film footage of the Berlin Wall – symbol of the Communist threat – being torn down, I remembered thinking I would NEVER see that day. The “Evil Empire” had so entrenched itself into my world, that I could not imagine its disappearance. For months, we all shook our heads in disbelief that such a monumental shift in world power would occur in our life times. And for a few years, we all felt a little bit safer.

I’m thankful for that day, 20 years ago, and I pray for the day when the threat that brought down two towering buildings on American soil is also put to rest. After witnessing a day in Berlin two decades ago, I know anything can happen.


1 Comment

And on the 8th Day, She Gave Thanks for Friendship

I realize I have expressed appreciation for some pretty random things, and because of that, I feel it’s time for a disclaimer. I don’t want any reader to assume I am not thankful for the truly important blessings IN and OF life because I truly do. When I started this blogging challenge, I thought of the times I say to myself, “Oh, I just love fuzzy robes or rocking chairs or knee-high nylons.” You know – weird things that we have always enjoyed or just discovered.

Those are the kinds of items or experiences we rarely mention when counting our blessings or sharing “thanksgiving thoughts.” But I think people who possess an “attitude of gratitude” are thankful for EVERYTHING – including some silly stuff.

Last night after reading a friend’s “I’m thankful for…” comment on FaceBook, I thought I could categorize my most important blessings into 3 areas: my FAITH, my FAMILY, and my FRIENDS. So today I DO want to write about one of those topics – but just one aspect because its impact is so vast that I think most people could post 30 blogs on this one theme – friendship.

Friends are always important, but even more so when a person does not have any or many family members to lean on, mingle with, or grouch at. My mom’s friend Karen was such an individual. I didn’t know her well, and Mom only made her acquaintance about 5 years ago when she and Dad moved into their adult-living condominium. Because of that, I can’t share too many details about this lonely woman’s life.

Karen was in her 50s when we first met her. Mom and I figured she must have been one of the last of her generation to contract polio as we couldn’t think of many younger who suffered the effects of that deplorable disease. As a result, she could not walk, but she got around on a motorized scooter.

Karen had never married, and her parents and siblings had all passed away. Because of her many health issues, she had a difficult time holding down a job, and so she subsisted on a very limited income. Her dearest companion was her little dog.

Nevertheless, Karen possessed a fun sense of humor that often delighted my mother who was old enough to be HER mother as Karen was younger than my sister and me! But she looked and felt much older, so she fit in well with the residents whose ages ranged from the 50s to the 90s.

Karen and Mom visited ladies from church on a monthly basis. It was their assignment, but they enjoyed going once they got there. Karen always called for the appointments, thus ensuring that Mom was a dedicated visitor. They also played cards together every Thursday – the highlight of the week. After the card games or the homeowners’ association meeting, the two occasionally griped about a card player at the game or a poor decision at the meeting. They may have even grumbled about each other, for all I know.

Mom also drove Karen to the doctors’ offices on occasion – not always an easy task for my 84-year-old mother. In one sentence, she would complain about it and then admit she was glad she did it. Mom sometimes told me she couldn’t provide this transportation service anymore; she was getting too old. But she always did.

One day, Karen called Mom to tell her she canceled her doctor’s appointment so Mom wouldn’t need to take her. A few days later, however, Karen checked into the hospital, and Mom told me she wasn’t doing very well. Whenever we discussed Karen, Mom always added, “She doesn’t really have anybody, you know.”

I soon learned that Karen did have a niece when Mom told me that after a week, her friend was still in the hospital. And then she told me that nearly the entire building had been visiting her. Mom mentioned that she’d probably just call since Karen had so many visitors every day. But Mom didn’t call; she visited her friend and stayed for over an hour.

During that visit, Karen confided in Mom that she wondered if she’d “make it.” She didn’t. Mom called me in tears a couple of days ago, after learning that her friend just died. She felt so bad, and so did I. After discussing a few details – it may have been stomach cancer; a niece was handling the “arrangements;” one of the residents found a home for the dog – Mom added, “Karen didn’t really have anyone, you know.”

Oh, but she did! Karen didn’t leave behind a grieving husband or distraught children. She didn’t precede her parents or her siblings in death. Karen may not have enjoyed many family relationships, but she did experience the happiness that friends can bring into lives. Those people at the complex loved her everyday, including her final days, and they will miss her in future days because that’s what FRIENDS and FAMILY do.


2 Comments

Number 7 in My List of Thankful fors …

Note: I have a great boss – and she does not like me to refer to her with that title. (I think she sees herself as Dilbert’s head honcho when I call her that.) Awhile ago she celebrated a birthday, and her friend organized a book of tributes to present to her. I decided to share my appreciation for her by reprinting my accolades here.

Carolyn Gough ~ A STUDY in CONTRADICTIONS

Young enough to be my DAUGHTER; old enough to be my BOSS!

LOGICAL enough to run 3 MAJOR education programs; CRAZY enough to use her BODY as an IRONING BOARD

REFINED enough to wear CLASSIC styles; ROUGH enough to wear LEATHER and FAKE TATTOOS

SERIOUS enough to take on a room full of GRUMPY administrators; SILLY enough to HANG with MICKEY, Minnie, GOOFY, and Donald!

HOT enough to TURN HEADS; cold enough to need SPACE HEATERS in JULY!

PRUDENT enough to TRIPLE-CHECK a café’s bill; GENEROUS enough to GRAB the check.

FOCUSED enough to STICK to the TASK at hand; MINDFUL enough to stop and LISTEN to a COLLEAGUE

TALENTED enough to run the WHOLE show; GRACIOUS enough NOT to.

SUCCESSFUL enough to ATTRACT the SPOTLIGHT; HUMBLE enough to RELINQUISH it!

CONFIDENT enough to ACCEPT correction; CARING enough to GIVE it.

WISE enough to RENDER ADVICE; open enough to LISTEN to ADVICE.

ORGANIZED enough to promptly ARRIVE; PATIENT enough to LAUGH when I DON’T!

CALM enough to UNDERSTAND consequences; DESPERATE enough to KEEP me ANYWAY


Leave a comment

Day 6 ~ Have I Told You How Grateful I Am for Sweaters?

Lots o’ women LOVE autumn for a variety of reasons, and one of them usually includes the wearing of sweaters. Ahhhhhh, a FAVORITE clothing item.

While fall is usually considered sweater weather, the popularity of layering has extended the sweater season. Not that layering is a recent trend; NOW it’s a fashion statement in addition to a NECESSITY for staying warm. Because I swelter more than shiver, I rarely wear coats; thus ONE layer is usually all I need.

I do appreciate these “knitted jackets” or “pullovers,” and I have since I was a young teen in the early 1960s. Sweaters were a hot topic because of Hollywood stars like Lana Turner and Jane Russell, the so-called sweater girls. 1950s Sweater GirlI don’t know if I paid much attention to them as much as I admired the sweater-clad dancers on Dick Clark’s American Bandstand.

The show was produced in Philadelphia near a Catholic high school, and the teens were first in line when the popular TV show hit the air. Early on, the girls rock ‘n rolled wearing their school uniforms: pleated plaid or plain slim skirts and sweaters over blouses with Peter Pan collars. When the nuns heard about their activities, they pulled out the yardsticks to do battle.

The first directive to the teens was to stay away from the iniquitous studio, but when that went unheeded, the sisters demanded that girls were NOT to wear their uniforms. If the teenagers took time to change, however, they would not be the first in line and would miss the opportunity of dancin’ the afternoon away to the beat of Elvis Presley, Jerry Lee Lewis, Bill Hayley and the Comets, and other great artists.

To solve the dilemma, the resourceful girls merely pulled off their blouses and donned their sweaters on BACKWARDS, buttoning them up the back. The innovation became a hot fad throughout the nation, and I jumped on it, too.

One summer I used my own babysitting money to buy my school clothes for the first time. I babysat my second cousins for a week to earn $25, enough to purchase a pink cardigan sweater – that I wore backwards – and a black and pink plaid skirt. I think I also had enough money to buy some bobby-sox! (I believe I bought the whole ensemble at Woolworths – a precursor to Walmart.) I LOVED that outfit and wore it several times a week – that was before the days when I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing the same outfit on Wednesday that I wore on Tuesday!

And sweaters are still a favorite! They are cozy, comfy, and cute! I especially love the styles that are popular now and also appreciate the faux layered look with collars, sleeves, and shirtails peeking out from under a pullover.  Ooooh, time to run!!!!

We’re goin’ hoppin’ (Hop!)
We’re goin’ hoppin’ today
Where things are poppin'(Pop!)
The Philadelphia way; We’re goin’ drop in (Drop!)
On all the music they play On the Bandstand! BANDSTAND!